Monday, April 14, 2008

My conversation with St. Peter

Alright folks, been a while and as Bernard so politely put it "If you die, you do not want your final post to be about George W Bush". Bernard, you are absolutely right, could you just imagine that conversation with St. Peter........awwwwwkward

St. Peter - Dustin, before I can let you pass the gates I just have to ask you a couple of questions. Now, you have lived a good life, but you were a frequent sinner, now nothing really bad, so don't worry, but, I have to ask you, techinicalites and such....What is your biggest regret?

Dustin - Well, I would have to say it was not updating my blog that has a viewership of 3-5 people. I ended it talking about George Bush.....I am so ashamed of myself.

St. Peter -
Really? That is what you are going to say. All you really had to say was something generic like, "spend more time with my family" "work with charitable causes", something like that and you were in like flynn.......but you regret not updating your blog, well, ok, here is a pamphlet on hell, I personally recommend the sauna there, it takes a little getting used to the scalding steam, but it does wonders getting the toxins out of your body......that you will get from the lighter fluid soaked burgers you will be forced to eat.

Yes, St. Peter says "In like Flynn" in my mind. I think a big reason for my lack of posting is I have not been carrying a camera with me anymore, thus if I post I either have to steal pics or write a text heavy blog. One goal of mine is to take my camera out again which should help with the blogging.

So, the truth is, I am currently in Hudson, WI waiting for the old people to get out of the fitness center so I can work out. Working out is going to be something I try on for size. I know I always say this, but I am getting to be a hefty hefty individual. After my last experiment I decided I have a hard time eating healthy or sticking to a diet, so I am going to try the other half of losing weight, working out. This actually doesn't bother me to do. in fact, once you get a routine going it is extremely easy. I have this philosophy that follows that of Celebrity Fit Clubber Dustin Diamond. Eat what I want, work out, lose weight...should work I figure. I actually have a couple of plans already.

1. Kick Sam's ass in tennis. Now, I've played tennis twice in my life, so Sam thinks she is going to whoop me, and she well may....however, until the mean time, I have to assume I am amazing.

2. Play Mike in tennis...once again, I have to assume I will be amazing. I rock at Wii tennis afterall.

3. Shoot some hoops with Peter. This will be a battle of a fat, out of shape Dustin against the smoker's lung of Peter......we might stick with horse for a while. Funny story right, Peter went to high school in Ithaca. A town not far from Highland that, get this, is smaller than Highland. We figure we played each other in actual organized basketball. I have to assume I stuffed the ball in his face and quite possibly dunked over him. No, I am sure of it.

4. I am getting a bike, and am currently looking for candidates to go biking on some trails or something. Let me know if you are interested, you can apply online or over the phone.

5. Walk with Kristen. She lives right by me, we both talk a lot about losing weight, we both agree now that it is nice we should walk the wonderful streets of Waukesha.

6. Work out when on the road. Which is currently what I am wanting to do now....stupid old people.

While waiting, I am watching How I Met your Mother. Amazing show. Now, I watched the first episode when it was first on, and I thought to myself "This is a good show, I should make this a regular show I watch" Of course, I didn't. However, last week, Peter gave me the 1st season on DVD...yeah, I was right, it is amazing. About a bunch of mid 20's friends that You should all watch it or else you are going to regret not seeing it and St. Peter is going to send you right to hell when that is your one life's regret....don't say I didn't warn you!

As I said, I am currently in Hudson, WI right next to the Twin Cities, I had to spend one night in WI to make it feel like I am sort of home, thankfully Holiday Inns always upgrade me to suite's if they are open, and I have this awesome living room, kitchen, and hot tub right in the room. Yes, after I work out, I am going to sit in that said hot tub and pray to god the cleaning staff uses ultra potent cleaning fluid, because I am sure people have done it in there....icky. Anyways, on my long drive up I stopped off in Black River Falls to visit fellow Lowlander Lauree. We went off to a Chinese Buffet (eat what I want and work out) and talked about a possible camping trip. Now, Lauree and that group of friends always have a big camping trip every year, last couple years I have not been able to attend, but this year I think I will. The date will be the weekend of June 8th or something. We both think Canada would be a good destination. We had gone years back to Canada to camp and legally drink at 20, and it was a great time. She informed me that other might not want to take the long trek, but she was at least hoping for the Apostle Islands, which would be every bit as sweet.

Well, that is enough rambling on for now, I have to see if the old people are done preventing heart attacks.


Bdogschneeby said...

dustin, you british cocky sunabich I will own you on any biking trail in wisconsin!!! mikes $20 bicycle will leave you in da dust!!!

i agree fitness and eat whatever you want

i agree peter is fat, wait you didnt say that, awwe hell ile say it any way he is a fatty. I could dominate both of you in basketball or water polo!

welcome back to blogger land

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